It's Over

Disclaimer: This one's overly full of emotions. I am was your perfect drama queen. Sorry for the lame pain within this piece of shizz. *wink* I just know this is so timely.

Bright eyes,
Wide lies.
The truth I should forget,
As my mind goes on a reset.

Catch a pain, fake a grin,
Feel the poison setting in.
Wanna rip you with my claw,
But baby, you're a no show.

Tell it to me straight,
Say it to my face.
Get tired of your pretense,
My overhauled head's too dense.

I've pulled out a trick for you to see,
But you didn't even bothered to run after me.
I saw you unsure of it,
I became too sick to bits.

I've laid all my cards on the table,
Put out my heart, threw it on a gamble.
You just like the chase,
There's my heart gone into waste.

I felt like I was buried deep,
For that I just cried myself to sleep.
You know now it just doesn't matter,
Because I say now, "It's over."

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Forever 21

Two more sleeps and here comes birthday. I don't even feel that I'm twenty two. I don't know but I'm really not ecstatic about it. Maybe because of the "calling it off" thingy. When I was putting this post mentally, I've got a lot to say and now that my fingers are doing the talking, my thoughts have gone elsewhere. BLAH.

WISHLIST:

• ELF eye shadow palette in WARM
• Marionnaud flat top brush
• NYX round lipsticks / NYX matte lipsticks
• Wedge shoes
• Iphone 4s HAHAHA ;)
• A small cork board for my room
• Colorful pens or whatever's useful for writing
• A personal wish hoping to be granted by our Lord
• An e-mail reply from a couple of organizations I want to volunteer in

I can't think of anything else as of the moment. I should have done this earlier so I can add more when something pops in my head. Regrets, regrets. Well, August 13, I might as well be excited about you. HAPPY BIRTHDAY to me! :)

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What I Want and What I Really Need

After a few days of trying to understand what's happening, I've had a mind constipation, I can't seem to digest everything into my mind yet, I am feeling better today. I usually over think things through which isn't healthy for me because I just tend to see even the slightest hint of negativity.

I have watched a TV show last night, for those who might know it, the 700 Club Asia, which had let me look into the brighter side of things. A guest there broke up with her boyfriend and after almost two years, they've got back in each other's arms. What she had said made a huge impact to me. This is where my brain to mouth malfunction had brought me: "We have plans for ourselves, but the Lord's plan is better. We should surrender our concerns to Him, for we know that He will NEVER forsake us. We should let Him handle what's bothering us because His plans NEVER fail. He knows what our hearts desire even without words uttered by our lips. His answer to our prayers are only YES, NO or WAIT. But whatever his answer may be, it really indeed is the best for us."

So I'll stop worrying and I'll put an end in trying to do everything to grasp what I want US to be. I am lifting it all up to Him and wherever it may lead me, I'd gladly accept.

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Burn

"What you said when you left just left me cold and out of breath. Guess I let you get the best of me."

I'm fine, tired, asphyxiated. So it took me a couple of days to process things up and the good news is... I can't still freakin' digest everything.

I'm getting better when it comes to throwing rants, don't I? Sorry for two consecutive lame entries. I'll be back for real posts when I finally feel okay.

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Feeling Heavy

Hi everyone! I'm feeling a bit heavy right now. My boyfriend and I just had a time off from everything due to some things that are not worth elaborating. *sobs* Praying that we can still work this out. So.. there.

Well anyway, I'm thinking of holding a giveaway. What do you guys think?

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One Shade of Red

Excuse me for my randomness. I always admire the guts of women who can sport red lipsticks. Yes, Anne Curtis! I envy them, I look darker when I wear red lippies. Sorry, but the following are my attempts to look effortless in the red shade. You have been warned. :)

Pardon for the unclear pictures, I just used my camera phone.

Lipstick used: Pop Shop in Princess Heart

Here's a swatch:

(with flash)

(without flash)

The color isn't too strong nor light, just the right shade of red. Plus it has a long staying power, even if you drink or eat, it doesn't go off easily.

Personally, I think red puckers match a nude or bare face because it draws too much attention to your canvass. Unless you want to look like flared or something, then go on put on whatever you want to your face. What are your favorite lipstick shades? Do you always wear red ones? Tell me more about it! :) 

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Manhater

*DISCLAIMER: I saw this entry at my old blog site. It made me laugh reading this. Napaka-kiddie. :))*

     I haven’t written for a couple of months but hey, im back, trying to make a nonsense freeverse poem for everyone else of you to relate with. Wish you could get yourself into it. If it makes sense, though. Hope it doesn’t sound too bad or worse, hope it doesn’t suck  that much. ;) 

"Manhater"

You always pinch my cheeks that only you adore,

The only one that soulfully makes my mind sore.

You’re the one who tucks me inside those arms,

The only one that gives me a restless warmth.

You left me alone under the cold pouring rain,

Feeling so helpless struggling through the endless pain.

With that very moment, wished I could be numb,

But felt sorry for myself I just became dumb.

For once, you made me happy it nearly made me scream,

But now it will never happen even in my wildest dream.

Not just once, you made me feel so hurt,

All those times,I have to make my feelings blurt.

Nevertheless, I can only state,

After all the heartaches I’ve been through,

I’ll still never be…

A goddamn manhater. :D

     I'm allowing you to laugh at my work. I know it is funneeeh! :))

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